DS3 - Worst RNG Lorian VS A Bad Player - Video

Hot take time: The Twin Princes are a bad boss... from a No Hit perspective. On a normal playthrough they're one of the best in the series, period. There is no boss that gets me more hyped than this one, so why do I say they are bad? RNG! It's always RNG. I vehemently detest Bushy's statement that "No Hit fights are just rng farms", I think a lot of No Hit fights (not runs, obviously, completely different game atp) are actually very skill based, and very impressive being able to be done consistently as well. However, this fight is exactly that: an RNG farm. What you see in this video is not skillful, my victory wasn't my own, it was purely just ramming my head into a brick wall until I finally got a good sequence of teleport guesses. That's literally all it is, a sequence of correct guesses.

Why is that? The Teleport, obviously. It is one of the most poorly designed moves of all time, in any game I've played. The fact that there are 4, completely different attacks with completely different timings he can do during a Teleport already sounds like a horrible idea, but it gets worse somehow. You will never be fully safe from seeing the Teleport, you could be hugging Lorian's asscheeks the entire fight and he can still Teleport if he wants to, it's not just a bad move you can ignore, it's a bad move you HAVE to see every time. It's not like Morgott's parry counter where you can dodge preemptively to avoid the unreactable and still be able to dodge/react to the other potential parry counters. It is genuinely an unforgivable completely RNG based trash move.

Some people will say "oh he telegraphs what move he does before the teleport", this is only slightly true: it is true that he does telegraphs before his Teleports (sometimes, at least) but these rarely ever actually mean anything. For example: Lorian raises his sword over his head like he's about to slam, Teleports, and does a thrust instead? That's just scratching the surface too, the only telegraph that is 100% accurate (from what I've noticed at least) is the Teleport mid combo with his second swing (see 1:58 for example). I have a LOT of data on this one move and I can safely say the telegraphs do not matter for the most part. Which means the entire fight is just the right sequence of gambling, which is frankly absurd.

I honestly wouldn't be so mad if this were in Elden Ring, I expect this shit from Elden Ring (I mean it's basically in the game already), there's worse things in Elden Ring, it would be right at home with the ocean of "oh yeah that's complete RNG good luck lmao" moves in that game, I'm just disappointed that it's in DS3. I expect more from this game man. I think Twin Princes is just a no go for No Hits for me from now on, I prefer to enjoy the games I play.

If you want a cleaner looking fight, go watch my all bosses No Hit video, that fight looked sexy, still wasn't skillful but damn was it beautiful.

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